Dear Me: A Letter To My Insecure 16 Year Old Self
This is based on another WordPress post I saw.
The way she wrote it caught my attention and it made sense to jot this down so I can tell my potential kids/ grand kids/ nieces/ nephews (or at least my pets) what I went through and the reality of it all..
Honestly 16 year old Anto, what’s wrong? You’re being insecure over nothing:
1. Yes..your hair is extremely curly, embrace it
So what if in the early 2000s, straight hair was the epitome of beauty. Give it 6 years darling, the perms are coming out.
2. Having one year of ugly was the BEST DECISION OF YOUR LIFE.
Yeah..I dont know how to tell you this. Basically, you decided on having a life changing event (a risk you took really).
You cut off all your hair, you put on braces and you dived yourself into homework, art and dance. The good news is, is that it all paid off 🙂
Your hair now has the spiral locks you’ve been waiting for (with almost no frizz) and you got bangs. Your teeth is straighter and
3. So what if you look anorexic, enjoy the fact you can eat whatever you want.
I know you get annoyed about people commenting and even gawking disgustedly at your skinniness. What else could you do? You trained for dance and cheerleading A LOT so that just skyrocketted your metabolism. Plus, you were one of the rare few who enjoyed PE.
You even ended up having a couple of modeling gigs so stop listening to their unpleasant commentary. The rest of the world knew better and trust me – when you’re 20, your attempt to put on some pounds succeeded so enjoy whatever you can eat now cos at 24, you’ll be watching your diet.
4. Don’t forget who your REAL friends are.
I know you’re still finding yourself and being the easy-going kid that you are, you found yourself with some pretty bad company. Luckily, you knew better and stayed true to yourself.
As angry as you were with some of your friends (at 16, there were enough childish reasons), they will be the ones who would still be there for you.
5. Perfection is perceptive.
There is no clear represenation of what perfection is. I know you and your current friends all had a similar vision of what perfection is at the time but girl, THAT was not perfect.
The people who you thought were “perfect” in school – perfect body, perfect looks, had the perfect boyfriend etc and who you strived to be like them, ended up being bums with no real assets.
In fact, you outgrew that idea of perfection when you were in Ngee Ann Poly, Mass Comm and were exposed to new ideas. (Oh yeah I forgot to tell you, you did make it to Mass Comm).
See, you were already perfect in your own way which leads me to my next point..
6. Stop caring about what others think about you – be as daring as you want and live.
You may not believe me now but at 24 years old, you’re beaming confidence. See even typing this out is a shocker to you right? You’re 24 year old self doesn’t give two shits anymore about what the world thinks about her and here’s what you have been doing to get to this level:
1. You survived full-time school, part-time work (poly)
2. You survived part-time school, full-time work (uni)
3. You never took $$ from your mum after leaving secondary school (unless it was a loan which you paid back in your next paycheck)
4. You survived having 4 close family members passing on in 2009-2011.
5. You worked your ass off and became a manager at 22 years old. You have trained various teams and made a difference.
6. When you weighed your heaviest at 57kg (I know shut up, I know you’re 45 kg now), 2 magazines did features on your sense of style.
7. But one of the biggest trigger for this change, is when you started dating again and it wasn’t planned. And no Anto, not Omar. Good lord I completely forgot at 16 you still liked this fella..no Anto, big no.
You stopped liking him that very year actually..cos you found someone better so dive right in 🙂
Remember, you know me and I wouldn’t lie to you so take it all in for a sec and enjoy yourself..